Everyone has their little secrets.  Some are bigger than others, some are more dangerous.  Some may go bump in the night, while others simply wish to be left alone.  That's all right, dearie.  You just step into my office and we'll come to an arrangement.

 

Birth certificates and driver's licenses are a piece of cake.  Passports and credit reports allow for some creativity.  Death certificates are a dime a dozen, but a death scene's going to cost you a little extra.

 

Don't even think about writing a check, dearie. What you need is hard, cold cash.  But don't get too comfortable filling that briefcase with it.  Do enough business with me and sooner or later favors become more valuable than cash.

 

You've been warned, dearie.  Now sign on the dotted line, if you please...